May Written Words Make Up for What I Fear to Say

I don't say it every day

Because, darling, I'm still afraid.

Perhaps for selfishness or mere pride

But whatever it is, it is not fair

Because all you expect is my care

And all you deserve is my truth

Yet, I struggle to look into your eyes and say

All the things you want to hear

That is why I write to you,

Though in the language you don't understand,

To relieve my heart and peace my mind.

My thoughts become reality and thus truth

And satisfied I return to my silent stares and distant smiles

Then you look at me again,

With disappointment darkening your eyes,

And I know my job has failed

For you still don't know, still haven't heard

From my lips your desired words

And you haven't felt from my arms

The warmth of the love I have for you.

Bear with me, darling,

Through this letters I promise you,

One day I'll be able to look at you

Not through the stars in the midnight sky,

But through my eyes right in front of you

And I will finally admit,

With a racing heart and watering eyes,

That only you, my dear, I love.